The Stout Republican

My favorite band is Metallica. Interesting start, let’s see where it takes us.

Traditionally, elitist Metallica fans will sing praises about the band’s pre 90’s music. I, however, am above any sort of elitism.  Being above such elitism allows me to avoid any sort of non-popular (in a popular way) generalized thinking that comes with it.  You know, the sort of thinking that forces us to stop liking a band when they get radio time to the point that the sunglass sportin’, hat wearin’, black socks up to his Dickies shorts “bro” in the bank line in front of us badly whistles said Sellout’s latest pop chart toping single, while we resist the urge to tell him that we knew said Sellouts while they were still fresh in their musical genius, and the only way to buy their CD was at their concert, and you know what we say about concerts: 

“If it’s not small venue it’s no venue.”  We respect genius of the musical genre while at the same time rejecting genius of the career genre.  And by “we” I mean you, because while ”we” (you) silently judge our “bro” in the bank line, I (me) join in and whistle the lead solo back to back with our “bro” a’la Van Halen. 

It is this sort of popular (in a non-popular way) generalized thinking that allows me to reach the conclusion that new Metallica, is in fact, superior to old Metallica.  No opinion, just fact.  You might as well argue gravity’s counter point. 

My favorite band is Metallica.  So of course I’d be intrigued when while perusing the Metallica section at Best Buy (proudly taking up three vertical columns of the Rock/ R&B genre) I came across a CD by a band named “Apocalyptica“.  Apocalyptica is exactly what it sounds like, four guys playing Metallica covers on nothing but cellos.  “Purchase this CD I must” said I to myself.  I did so and immediately went home to listen to it in my Mom’s (it was 6 years ago) CD player.  What I heard was the kind of genius that hasn’t been heard since God said, “Let There Be Light”.  And I saw that it was good. 

My favorite band is Metallica.  So of course I’d be intrigued when while at the theatres a couple of months ago I saw a preview for a movie called Apocalypto (flimsy?).  I was taken back six years to that day at Best Buy where I discovered life’s meaning.  The preview was vague but well done, showing you enough to make you want to see the film without ever showing you what the film was about.  My anticipation mounted until finally it was released. 

Apocalyto the movie is very similar to Apocalyptica the band, except that there’s no tribute to Metallica, or cellos.  I almost hesitate to give too much away about the plot to this one because I felt I would be working against the vagueness of the add campaign that worked so well with me.  You get the impression, due to the rainforest setting, that the story takes place somewhere in South America.  We meet a tribe of natives on the hunt for food, and are introduced to the protagonist, “Jaguar Paw” (played by no-namer Rudy Youngblood).  You get the sense that he has some sort of leadership over the others, either from an actual rank he may carry, or more simply that he is a strong warrior and charismatic, making him easy to follow.  While they are returning to their small village they encounter an outside tribe who asks permission to pass through their land.  Permission for the outsiders to pass is granted but our hunting tribe notices that these outsiders look like they’ve been on the losing end of a battle.  No more questions are asked though and the tribe returns home, where the incident is forgotten and celebration of a successful hunt ensues.  Early the next morning they are attacked by a band of warriors and those who aren’t killed are tied up and taken, Jaguar Paw among them.  What follows is what the movie is all about, but again for the movie’s sake I won’t give any other plot points away. 

Apocalypto is driven almost entirely by action since there is very little in the way of dialogue.  A true action movie in every sense.  The acting is strong across the board, and very emotional at times despite the lack of speaking.  From the first scene where the tribe is on the hunt you are gripped in the suspense of what’s going to happen next.  The story is based very largely on coincidence and at times almost seems prophetic, but in a very believable way.  Very well directed by Mel Gibson, with a fantastic score by James Horner.  In the action category this one gets a 9.5, I’d be surprised to find a better film out there in this genre, but room must be made just in case.